Saturday, August 6, 2011

Humpbacks and Hunchbacks

A few things.  Please pardon that I am using bullets.

  • Baby product reviews are useless.  How can one website say a specific stroller is crap, but it is still voted Product Of The Year by another site? I've decided Derek! and I are getting the one that goes the fastest when we try it out at the store during our registry.
  • A baby boy outfit made me cry today.  I tried to hide it from Derek! and I think I did pretty well.  It had Peter Rabbit on it and reminded me of a set of books I bought for Dylan when he was a baby.  He would not sit still through those books for the life of me.  Lordy, I love babies.
  • Why is cereal so delicious and am I meeting my daily diet requirements if I live off it? Cause I'm gonna.
  • I don't know that I would have made it this far in my pregnancy without my counselor.  He's made so many things that should be obvious clear and I wish I could write him a thank-you note without sounding as crazy as I thought I originally was when I went in to see him in the beginning.
  • Putting distance between my parents and myself has been the best thing I have ever done.  I've done it before, but it was for a singular specific reason.  A disagreement or exchanging of words.  This time, I did it to spare myself from terrible disappointments.  I feel so much more guarded now. Safe and less vulnerable to having my heart broken anymore.
  • We might move.  We are about 92% certain it is going to happen.  The details of when are still being worked out, and I pray that it is after I deliver, but we have to seize opportunities as they present themselves, and that means I must be adaptable.  Less rigid.  We haven't told Dylan yet.  He is a chronic worrier. It's still too soon.
  • 4th grade is around the corner.  Dylan has become a young man in the span of a summer.  He is so kind and well-intentioned.  Even when he slips up and lets his emotions get the best of him, once the storm calms, he always apologizes for his behavior afterward.  What a beautiful soul this boy has. What a sweet sweet boy.
  • Derek! and I have decided on a name.  I'm not going to announce it before the baby is born.  Unfortunately, I feel as if that is something I allowed my parents to ruin for me.  I've learned that I don't have to let them have that grip on me since then, but the damage has been done and I can't bear to open something this important up to being insulted again. Having a baby, making the decision to get pregnant, being pregnant, and preparing yourself, your family, and your household for all of the upcoming changes is a very emotional time.  I've learned that it's a beautiful process and having consistent support and understanding from those you love is of the utmost importance during this time.  I don't want to associate the birth of my second son with any negative feelings or emotions when I look back on this time.  Consistency, support, and understanding is not one of my parent's strengths.  
  • I'm roughly the size of a whale. And the sweat, oh GOD, the sweat. It's about 325 degrees outside with 780% humidity and there is a chance I will melt if not constantly in the air conditioning.
Derek! is home from work and I need his attention. All for now.

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